Desi Spiderman!!!!! Awesome!!!!

According to me, the award for the BEST WORST MOVIE EVER goes to 'desi spiderman', hands down!. It's probabaly the most hilarious crap i've ever seen.

It's full of overacting people. Here are the you-tube links for the parts of the movie and the special song that I love :D

Part 1- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTO1chxWMPI&feature=related

Part 2- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mRY42TMxn1c&feature=fvw

Part 3- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ODn-8XlSb4I&feature=related

Part 4- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IVMtv7rd3-g&feature=related

Part 5- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=61kPqfrtkEE&feature=related

Song- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3-RW3nUHs8g

He he he!!! Ha ha ha!!!! Ho ho ho!!!!! Yo yo yo?!??!?!

This is the profile of the most famous upcoming rapper from India (or so he claims) :D

Hopesh Dangal (HOPP DOGG)-
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001337297019

Do read it!
When I shared this link on my facebook wall people cracked up laughing. Since i'm known in my family to be the only decent rapper (or probably the only person who loves to rhyme stuff), a relative of mine asked me to write a rap of my own that could compete with Hopp Dogg's abysmal rap, and I did.
Here's the rap (Hopp dogg style :P)
Relative: dude you should rap... you can do better than hopesh.
Me:
But I can only rap YO!
and only Hopesh can sing such crap YO!
Hopesh pe lagna chahiye heavy fine YO!
Iska rap hai bahut bada crime YO!
Jaldi hi main ZOO me jaunga YO!
Hopesh ko wahan bharti karwaunga YO!
cuz he thinks he is cool YO!
the dude is a bloody fool YO!
the lyrics of his rap SUCK
HOPP DOGG is out of LUCK.
Oh Santa! take him away in your toy sack.
Hopesh ko koi batao k J.C. just struck back!
YO!

(in case you are wondering who this J.C. is, and why the hell his name is in the rap, then I should tell you that J.C. is my rapper name. YO! :P)

Accident Number 4! a.k.a. The road inspection :P

Date- 29th December, 2010

Place- Near Janakpuri West Metro Station
Description-
There's been a lot of fog in Delhi lately, as I've read in the news papers, but I haven't even ventured out of my room (been watching episodes from all the seasons of F.R.I.E.N.D.S... again), let alone the house, so I had no idea just how bad it was. My phone, Samsung F-480, has been acting up for the last 2 days, it keeps getting hanged, so I decide to finally stop being a lazy-ass-bum and get it fixed from the nearest HotSpot from my home.


As I am riding my Apache moving toward B-1 Janakpuri, barely 5 minutes out of my house, an uncle (in my left side) decides to cross the road without looking anywhere in the horrible fog. To avoid hitting him I had to swerve my bike to the right. There was a Tata Indica moving along side me, so I had to cut in front of it to avoid hitting either the uncle or the car. As I take a cut ahead of the Indica, I totally blank out! I have nothing but darkness in front of my eyes! And then I open my eyes a little and realize that my bike is spinning on the road, and there are sparks flying out from where the left handle is touching the road surface while I'm on my back and spinning with the bike, and I feel my 'keski' getting loose and flying off my head. I close my eyes again for a second, as if I'm just blinking, and when I open them again I realize that this time the left side of my face is touching the road, and I see the road surface from so close that the memory of it will haunt me for ever! I close my eyes again and after 2-3 seconds I finally stop spinning. I try getting up ... and miraculously I can! I stand and see that a crowd has assembled around me, thankfully people behind me had applied brakes to avoid hitting me and some people come to pick up my bike. I move towards the side of the road after somebody hands me my 'keski' and I tie my 'juda' while another guy stops his bike and picks up my bike from the middle of the road and brings it towards me and I thank him.


I sit on my bike, and start tying my 'keski' by looking in its right rear view mirror and now, almost 40 seconds after I got up from the road, I'm smiling! Not because i've hit my head on the road and gone crazy, but because I'm thankful to God that I wasn't on my Enfield bullet when the accident happened, and the fact that I'm still alive! The people who came to help me up, are looking at me like I'm some kind of a weirdo, they think I'm smiling because I've not been injured. It's quite dark, so they can't see my injuries. One person says to me: "Thank God that you didn't get any injuries!" and I look at him and say (while smiling): "I did get injuries! Look at my face!" and he looks more closely, and is shocked! Then the crowd starts to thin, and as I finish tying my 'keski' I kick start my bike. It still works! so I give it a good acceleration while it's in neutral to check everything out...seems some nuts and bolts of gone loose cuz the rear fender is making some noises, but nothing so serious that the bike can't be ridden. I move towards HotSpot, cuz that was what I had left my house for, with the cold breeze stinging my face I brave the cold and the pain and ride, all the while thanking God! I reach HotSpot, give them my phone and clean up some dirt from my face in their bathroom while they make a receipt for when the phone is to be delivered back to me. All the while, the customers and the employees in  the shop keep staring at me, because I'm bleeding from both my hands, my left leg and my face; my jacket was torn along with my jeans, and I'm standing there (with difficulty as the adrenaline starts to wear off a little) with a smile on my face like you've never seen. I leave from there 15 minutes later, dreading the ride home. Halfway home I decide to visit the doctor myself. He applies antiseptic on my face and my knees, gives me some medicine, gives me a tetanus vaccine but can't put bandage on my face as I need to keep the injury open and allow it to come in contact with air or it may leave a scar (he says). After that I was good to go.

Good thing I was wearing my contact lenses at the time, if I had been wearing my glasses, there would most likely be small shards of glass and plastic embedded in my eye and face. Also glad that the sparks from the handle & road were not too close to the eye when I had my eye opened, or it might have melted those contact lenses (who knows).


Got back home, and scared the shit out of my parents when they saw my face 5 minutes after I entered into the house, cuz I had gone straight to my room.  They were watching some saas-bahu program and so it was easy to slip into my room as they were busy with the telly and probably didn't expect me to turn up home the way I did and so the injury went unnoticed. Besides I hadn't seen the complete damage to my face myself, so I wanted to be sure beforehand that it wouldn't give them a heart attack if they saw it or gross them out :P


This was one of my worst accidents.... but I like to say "the worst accident, so far" cuz there might be an accident one day that'll probably really hurt me, so that i end up in a hospital bed with a fracture or two, or worse. But it will be the accident that'll remain in my memory (if not in my memory, in case I ever get amnesia, then surely on this blog) FOREVER!


The following is the status (and the comments that I received on it) that I posted on Facebook when I got home (yes, I was a facebook addict once who had to post everything in his life... but I got over it):


‎45 mins ago I was in the biggest accident that I have ever been in... and I walk away from it like I always do- scratched, badly bruised, but still standing, and smiling.


Monica: oye wot happened..
Me: slipped from bike......
aaj to pehli baar itni chot lagi hai k kuch kehne ki hadd nahi.

Monica: hey bhagwan paagal aadmi.. kiske khayaalo me tha.. jo control nai raha.. lolzz. nywaz ab kya kahu.. u already injured.. dhyan rakha kar professor..

Me:  bahut zyada injured yaar!!!!

itni buri haalat meri aaj tak nahi hui

Parul: brave boy still smiling

Himanshi: oye hath chod k bike chalyega to kya hoga....

rest kr n get wel soon...

Simran: Take care veer..

:)

Me:‎ @parul- kal apni smiling wali pic bhi upload karunga.... it's the silliest smile in the world!!!! :P

@himanshi- haath chod k chalate time kabhi nahi girta main.... jab dono haathon se chalata hun tabhi girta hun

@simran- I will buddy! but now, i think it's time to take my medicine :P

Parul: yeah sure

MY FACE THE NEXT DAY!

Some ways in which I described the accident when everybody started asking -"kya hua?"(What happended?).

FYI: I like to give different answers to the same question, when asked again and again. It keeps me amused.

1. road bahut achchi thi yaar, uspe apna face rub karne ka mann kiya.... to galti se zyada rub ho gaya :P :D

2. gives new meaning to the expression i use when i'm riding my bike- "just me, my bike and the open road!" :P

3. road inspection ho gayi kal... bahut paas se dekha maine road ko...infact 2-3 second tak dekha, before i closed my eyes... kaafi achchi aur tough road hai... hum log aise hi govt ki burai karte hain :P

4. what a smashing end to the first decade of the 21st century! :D

5. The road and I had a fight. I body-slammed the road and the road punched me in the face! It was declared a tie! :P